"Let's try a bit longer luvvie, you must be close to doing a poo..."
"I want to get off the toi-yet!"
"You sure Bearsy?"
(Voice of mum interjects...)
"She's close, really close.."
(Weak dad attempts to fix serious expression on face)
"Won't you give it a bit longer, luffiduff?"
*dismount now almost complete*
"I want to get off the TOI-YET!!"
"OK, OK, sweetie, all good, into the bath"
*picks up toddler*
*places in bath*
PHUTT!! A great brown cable splits in two as it hits the water, disintegrating in seconds among the various porous bath toys.
"I done a poo daddy."
So after hand-scooping most of it out, and pushing the rest into the plughole, and lobbing all the toys out around the bathroom floor, Bear has her first, standing-alone-like-a-big-kid shower. She couldn't believe how funny that was!
A pub poem - My chip has fallen to the floor. The bar is crowded. I look down. *Sehnsucht*. A lawless longing for The unattainable. I frown.
19 hours ago