He is my boy, my little Cub.
Friends recently experienced such loss. I couldn't imagine their world or how they kept going, they were so much stronger than I could be if I were dropped into that place. Hell is real, Hell is sewn into the arteries of a parent who has lost a child.
As Leonard Cohen puts it:
Like a baby stillborn... I have torn, everyone, who reached out to me.
Cub is back in action, a little restrained but with enough vigour that we're taking in breath again.
I want to wrap his mum up in cotton wool and carry them both through the next 3 months...