Thursday, August 28, 2008

Protecting Bear, protecting Cub

A petulant protective instinct has come to the fore lately for Beloved and I.

We visit friends with a newborn. All nice, naturally they are still getting their heads around it all. But newborn's aunt then arrives and clearly doesn't want us around.

Aunt is someone we know well, who has been cute with Bear in the past. She ignores us and uses body language akin to pulling her pants down and taking a crap in front of us.

Mildly annoying perhaps. But she also does this to Bear. She does not greet Bear. Bear tries to say hello and is rebuffed by the same passive-aggressive body language.

I feel hurt and angry on a deeper level to a personal slight. If you are rude to my Bear you are rude to me 5 times over. We leave and I am caught between wanting to give a second chance and wanting to delete this person out of our lives. A public facebook execution would be a start.

Beloved then articulated something to me along the lines of feeling deeply protective of Cub, because some friends and relatives are making less effort to keep track of his progress than they did with Bear.

Bear was the first, sure. But we are very conscious of wanting to make sure Cub feels just as loved. We became a bit indignant.

So when we found out he is a boy, there was no universal mail or text out, no general facebook spray. The hint was there to read the blog of course, and for those of you still making the effort to come here I was happy to share. But many other friends and relatives will find out via the long tail of information dissipation.

Unless they get on the phone and ask.

And seeing as you did- Cub and Beloved are both well, Bear is hurling herself around with spirit and abandon, and the cats are slowly but surely learning to sidle up and share cuddles.


Anonymous said...

Hey man, saw your post just after you announced it, <3 RSS feeds. Anyway sorry about not saying anything but GRATS!
Btw I'll let you guys know soon what I'm doing for my birthday, most likely be at my place with a spit roast.
Speak to you soon.

Anonymous said...

I would also want to strike someone off my friendship list if they treated my daughter like that. Poor little Bear. Makes me feel quite outraged.

Have noticed too that excitement about No. 2 Boy is less than it was for No. 1 Girl. Dunno why? I think I was one of the first of my friends to have a baby, but now lots of people have kids. Hey I'm still excited about No. 2 Boy, and I'm excited about your Cub too.